When Did I Go From Miss To Ma'am?

I'm sitting at a coffee table in a restaurant happily having breakfast while I edit a manuscript. A man, apparently younger than I thought, sits at the end of the same coffee table working on his computer. He leans over to me and says, "Ma'am, do you mind if I scoot closer so I can plug in my computer? The battery is running low."

What? Did he just say, 'ma'am'? I recover quickly and smile. "Sure," I say. Then I excuse myself and head to the restroom to see what he sees in me. I expect an old lady to stare back at me in the reflection of the mirror, but I don't see that. Yes, I am older than him, but I think I look okay. So, what makes me a "ma'am"? Is it an air of confidence? Maybe. Do I actually look older than I think I look? This is possible. Is it that I'm simply more comfortable in my skin? Possibly. I can't figure it out. Somewhere around 35 years, people started referring to me as a "ma'am" rather than a "miss". I simply wonder what happens at this magical age that causes the cross over from "miss" to "ma'am". I mean, I know there's no going back. It's just a hard word to embrace.

Blizzard 2010-Creating "Community"

The blizzard has moved away from Baltimore, and we have over 26 inches of snow. Some of the drifts are in excess of five feet. Everything has come to a halt. It's lovely. This should happen more often. The heavy snowfall encourages (or forces) people to talk to one another and work together. This is the time when I get to see "community" happen. It doesn't happen often enough. It's nostalgic for me.

I grew up in Alpharetta, Georgia, in the 1980's. Back then, Alpharetta, was a small town. Everyone knew everyone (which could be a bad thing, but I was too young to realize this). The Milton High School Annual Rodeo and Antiques Show attracted the whole town. When I went to high school, Alpharetta, only had a few restaurants (that I remembered)- the Dixie Diner, the Alpharetta Soda Shop, and Hardees. In my senior year, Kentucky Fried Chicken opened, and everyone was thrilled. We had a Senior parade, which closed down Alpharetta. The Seniors rode in the back of convertibles and trucks and waved to the townspeople.

Today I walked on York Road to get to the grocery store, which was fine because the traffic was very light. There were no sidewalks available. On my way to York Road, I met new people in the neighborhood. I passed by an outdoor meeting of neighbors on the next street. The road had not been plowed and two cars were stuck in the three feet of snow. What were they going to do? I offered to buy groceries for a neighbor. It was a great day.

There's no school tomorrow and the next snow storm arrives in three days. The fun continues...

Note: I learned two new words during the blizzard of 2010. The first word was SNOW THUNDER. As I understand it, occurs during a big snow storm. The thunder is a different kind of rumbling. It's audible, but it sounds like someone has covered the thunder with pillows. The other word I learned was GROUND BLIZZARD. From what I understand, a ground blizzard occurs when there is already snow accumulated on the ground. The winds are over 30 miles an hour and cause the existing snow on the ground to spin around in the air causing white out conditions. We experienced both of these conditions with this last storm. It was awesome.

The Chance To Be A Child Again

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6, 2010 (3:00am)--Why am I still awake? There's a blizzard, silly, and I can't sit still or relax! It's just so exciting. There must be at least 15 inches of snow on the ground. Whoa! I just saw lightning...there's the muffled sound of thunder-- did anyone see or hear that? The snow is supposed to continue for another 18 hours with a total accumulation of 25-30 inches. This will be one of Baltimore's top 10 largest snow amounts in record history. How wonderful is that?

As I sit here nibbling on olives and cheese, I think about our family's big plans tomorrow. They include eating a big breakfast, baking banana bread, taking Marley (our dog) on a snow walk, making snow angels, sledding down the middle of the road (I mean NO one is driving-nor should they be), and building a snowman. Its going to be loads of fun.

I moved to Baltimore in 1996. Since then, there have only been about two major storms. I can't wait to wake up tomorrow.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6, 2010 (11:00am)--WOW! You should see the snow! According to the local television station we have 24 inches of snow on the ground. I personally think there is more than that. The snow is supposed to continue for another 10 hours. The totals should be around 30-36 inches. We had the big breakfast of egg and ham sandwiches and hot coffee. Now we are preparing to go outside. I'm so excited, it's like being a child again. I think I am one of maybe five people who are thrilled by the snow. Why is that? This is a time for our family to bond, work on home projects, try out a few new recipes, put together a new puzzle, watch a few new movies, and pop popcorn.

I love the fact that everyone HAS to slow down because no one can go anywhere, even if they want to. Our road has not been plowed. In fact, I don't even see a path in the street. I guess our family will be creating one shortly. All I can say is that it's 26 degrees, which is comfortable given the circumstances, and I have my first pair of snow pants, which is much more practical (and warm) than the sweatpants I used to wear in the snow. The day is going to be wonderful...wish you could be here.

Hopeful Not Hopeless in 2010

Yep, I've been out of touch since August 2009. Life has been tough with the economic down turn. The kids had a hard time adjusting to school and my new schedule. There were paycuts in our household, so I took a second job. Between caring for my kids, helping with their schooling, completing my manuscript, and working two jobs, I've been very, very busy, a lot stressed, and tired beyond words.

The nice thing about life, though, is that it's constantly changing. Almost six months later, I find myself in a much better place. I can smile, I can relax, and I can enjoy life.

Let me just sum it up by saying that in 2009, I felt hopeless. In 2010, I feel hopeful. It's good to be actively blogging again.

Visitation Rites

After a week of vacation in the Outer Banks, my husband, kids, and I drove down to Tampa, Florida. A few days later we drove over to Orlando, and then finally we headed down to Port Charlotte. We visited my siblings and parents in a whirlwind tour because we haven't been on a trip to see my family in Florida for two years due to economics (you know what I'm saying).

I have wondered on occasion why there hasn't been more of a desire from my other family members to visit us up here in Baltimore? Is it assuming too much that we, as a family of four on a limited budget, should visit all of my family in Florida every year?

The answer to this question is just not that simple. The selfish answer is YES!! We would love to have visitors up this way. It would save us money, but it would also create additional opportunities for all of us to meet and give all of the kids a chance to play in our stomping ground up here in Baltimore, Maryland.

In the end, though, everyone has to make their own choices for their own reasons. Driving home 19 hours alone with the kids gave me new perspective. We are only here a limited time and our kids will only be young once (yes, my thoughts run deep.) I depressed myself greatly by doing a little "visiting-the-family-math." If we travel to Florida for seven days every other year, and assume that my parents live to the age of 90, the math proves that we will see them roughly 15 times for a total of just over three months. How horrible is that? Three months over the course of 30 years! If I want my children to have a relationship with their grandparents, nieces, nephews, aunts, and uncles, then it's MY responsibility to make this happen. I'm not mad at anyone. I'm simply glad that I did the math now.

I miss seeing my family, and I hope that they will come up here to visit soon. Maryland has quite a bit to offer visitors and so does our family.

Book Reviews

Outtakes From a Marriage - Ann Leary (wife of Denis Leary). The story begins with a wife discovering (completely by accident) that her husband is cheating on her. It follows with an in-depth look at love, life, regret, hope, and despair. The story is believable and as heartbreaking as rewarding. A definitely good read.

The Devil in The Junior League - Linda Francis Lee. This is a very interesting story about the deep south, as in Texas. The main character finds her wealthy, fancy, pristine life upturned when her husband does something really naughty. As a popular, beautiful woman, her husband's situation cannot be discovered by the Junior League, a highly coveted organization that only a select few are invited to join. The titillating story has many interesting twists and turns, that you don't see coming. I loved this story and I highly recommend it.

Famous quotes: Ginger Snap was not listening to her dad. He stopped, put his hands on his hips and said, "Ginger Snap, I keep repeating myself over and over like a broken record." Ginger Snap pondered this for a split second, and then with a look of complete puzzlement she said, "But Daddy, what's a record?"

Happy Birthday Hangover

May was a busy month. There was Mother's Day, Teacher Appreciation week, the end of school for Ginger Snap, Memorial Day, and for both of my children, it's their birthdays...within two weeks of each other. I was a frenzy of activity.

The thing that's really crazy, though, is that birthdays aren't just birthDAYs anymore. They are more like birthMONTHs. Each child has an actual "family birthday celebration" on the true date of birth (as it should be). Then there was the school celebration and, finally, the birthday parties. Sometimes there is also an extended family birthday party involving a barbecue and gifts from grandparents and relatives. Don't get me wrong. I know the kids love it, but truly, how many gifts does one child need during the birthday "season"?

The school celebrations vary depending upon the school my kids attended. My son attended a private school two years ago that requested a nut/milk/soy/egg-free food snack (not the easiest thing to do) as well as a book that could be offered to the school as a gift from the birthday child's family...okay. My daughter attended a private school that requested any snack in the World (donuts were very popular). My son is now in public school and this time the school requests NO snack due to food allergies/diabetes and a gift from the birthday child's family...Lightning gave a football and two jump ropes- a bit of a reversal, but not a bad thing at all.

I personally LOVE organizing birthday parties. My mom was quite the party maven- I have wonderful memories of my childhood parties (usually involving the 35 kids from my homeroom class). I have always wanted to recreate the parties, so each year we have a theme for each party, games, prizes, and usually a good sized group of kids. Two years ago, Lightning had 32 kids at his party. Last year he had 26 kids at his party, and this year he had 18 kids (a very workable number).

For the first time ever, my daughter persuaded me into using another establishment beside our home for a birthday party. She chose to have a Build-A-Bear Workshop party with 10 girlfriends.

The parties were so much fun, and I am so glad they are over :-).

Famous Chang children quotes:

'Mom that food was SO fattenous!' (Lightning)

'No way Mommy! That's prepostible!' (preposterous+impossible) (Ginger Snap)

Book review: "A Bad Bride's Tale" by Polly Williams. What do you do when you marry someone you don't love? This story was an interesting, seemingly believable, perspective on a girl that married someone she knew she didn't love completely. The story begins a couple of weeks before the wedding. She's asking herself hard questions about what she really wants in a husband. The answers aren't promising, but she feels that she (and her parents) are too committed financially to back out.

A Fond Farewell

Stormy Chang (1993-2009)

It is with a heavy heart that I bring the following news. My eldest cat, Stormy, aged 16.5 years old died on April 1, 2009, from a blood clot in her heart. She was a beautiful, talkative, animated adorable gray calico family member. I rescued her in 1993, when the next door neighbor in my apartment complex "threw her out". He was very glad that I found her and decided to keep her. I was very glad that I kept her as well. She was a six month old kitten at the time. Our whole family misses her terribly. If you want to get to know her a little better, I refer to her in the previous blog titled, "Pet Expectations".